Sunday, December 18, 2011
Our Strong Little Girl…
Finnley has been the most amazing travel companion on this voyage around the world. Our flight over was long but she played most of the time and made everyone smile around her. She had only one small fit of crying during the last leg but we felt it was our fault for a medicine overdose! Even the layover in Madrid was ok as long as we kept the stroller moving. We noticed what other parents were dealing with so it really could have been worse.
Roma and Volker shared with us last night how many worries and reservations they had about us coming from such a long way to Tenerife. She acknowledged me for my bravery in making the trek. The truth us – it was not bravery – it was me just being naïve! My extensive world traveling has left me with zero stamps on my passport up to this point. They don’t stamp you in Hawaii or Florida… I truly had no idea what, “It’s on the other side of the world” meant. I just knew that if that if the other side of the world is where the dolphins and whales were – then that’s where we would go. It gives new meaning to “ignorance is bliss.” There was no question in my mind and no fear about the decision to go. Finnley led us to her healing and I have learned that her soul is much wiser than mine. I am grateful that I ignored the few people who tried to explain the gravity of the trip to me and basically told me that I was crazy. I’ve had that “crazy” label all my life – at this point – it doesn’t even phase me!
For Finnley, this journey has been life altering. I am in awe of her calmness and ease with everything that has been asked of her this trip. She has been taken from a sun kissed boat repeatedly and put into cold sea water without a single complaint. Water and music have always been Finnley’s favorite forms of expression and her best mode of body movement so it has been incredibly therapeutic for her to enter the sea with Roma singing to the whales. Finnley was made for this. Maybe Finn created this somehow before she came…and how perfect is her name for this work? She named herself so maybe this is all her doing…who am I to question her plans?
Roma has a silver bell that she wears around her neck and she uses it to call in the whales. To watch Roma work is so beautiful. The songs that she and Volker sing to bring in the whales for the day is magical and the songs resonate and stay within your heart space, if that makes sense. Angie makes fun and laughs at my “English version” of the songs when I sing them because I hear the words so differently than what Roma sings. I have the tune right but I tend to massacre the language. Finnley gets it though and that’s what counts! Roma also makes whale sounds below the water that Finn loves to hear. It turns their heads and they respond, so the whales must understand her. Roma and Volker’s work is inspiring to say the least.
Finnley is gathering whales each time she enters the water and harnessing their healing. This journey has not been all roses for her but she has gone through it like she understands the uncomfortable parts are necessary for the healing to take place. Her sleeping has been even worse and I am sure that jetlag is to blame for some of that, but it’s really been hard on her.
At first, her seizures increased at night to the point where her legs extended and contracted each time she fell asleep and then the rapid movement would startle her awake. We knew this could be part of the healing process as her body made a shift but it has not been easy to watch my daughter as she has struggled through each night. Neither one of us has had sleep.
The other night, Roma brought over a homeopathic remedy for Finnley. Roma has a homeopathic Pediatrician who lives in Germany. This doctor only treats children with homeopathy and is an expert in remedies. Ignecia(if I am spelling it correctly) is for emotional release of sadness(other things as well but this is the only thing I caught). I took it as well. She said she hoped that one dose would be enough for Finnley and that if we see increased seizures it would be a good sign. Trust in these caretakers has been a big part of my process in our whale journey. Who wants to see increased seizures? But my gut said it’s right - so we gave the remedy. (My doula training taught me to trust my gut and it’s never wrong if I follow it – so I never question the gut!)
We gave it to her about 15 minutes before we left for dinner. It was the first time we were going out to eat in Tenerife - at a highly recommended local restaurant. We have been so careful with eating in but this was our treat night. We made the trek up the hills to “Pedro’s b y the Sea”(I have calves of steel by the way – this town has been all uphill!). Finnley sat very reserved in her stroller all the way there. We sat, we ordered and had just received our water when she began to sob. I mean – lip quivering, huge crocodile tears – it was heart wrenching. At first we thought something had scared her and we were trying to console her the usual ways. Then her legs began to jerk and the screaming began. I took her outside to calm her down but it was not happening. She cried and cried and it only got louder. After about 15 minutes of that, we decided to get the food to go and started back down the hill. Peggy stayed behind to get the food and Angie and I went home. Once we got Finnley walking, she quieted down and never made a peep the rest of the night. In fact, she was quiet smiley and calm. Poor Peggy sat at the restaurant for over an hour – they thought she cancelled the order when she asked for it “to go.” I guess in Spain you have to say, “Can I take it away.” Who would have known that?
Finnley slept great that night – only up for two hours and no seizures. She went back to bed and slept until 10am. Roma was thrilled with the release effects and apologized for giving it right before we left for dinner. She didn’t expect it to work so fast.
Finnley has been making more eye contact and really interacting with the whales. She looks right at them and giggles at their sounds. She loves Roma’s singing and snuggles right in to her chest. Roma holds her on the edge of the boat and Finnley dangles her feet into the water while the boat is going full speed and she loves it. The harder that child is bounced and thrown around the more she laughs. Her neck strength seems to already be improving but that could be because she is just seeing better and wants to hold her head up more. I am so grateful for each tiny step we see happening. And it’s all thanks to you – everyone that has supported us in this magnificent endeavor. We will be forever in your debt.